1.Ask open ended questions.
1.多問開放式的問題。
It is difficult to connect with someone if you ask them questions that can be answered in two words. There is no chance for a connection to develop. Instead of asking, “Where do you live?” trying asking “What do you think of your neighborhood?” Instead of “where did you get that shirt?” try “What do you think of the new store in the mall?” The longer you talk, the more chance there is for a connection to grow.
那些問了半天，只能讓對方蹦出兩個字的問題，就別再問了。想要進一步增進了解，還是聊點兒能讓人滔滔不絕的話題吧！畢竟聊得多了才更有可能進一步交往嘛~
2.Find things in common.
2.找找你們的共同點。
If your potential new friend interned at Credit Suisse, discuss that your brother works in finance. If she is all about reality TV, tell her which shows you’re into. Friendship is built on commonalities.
好朋友聊得來，首先要有共同話題。如果對方說自己在銀行實習，你可以提提你在金融圈的親朋好友。如果對方愛看真人秀，那就從你喜歡的節目聊起吧！
3.Use emotion words.
3.多聊點感受。
Sticking to the facts makes a conversation dry and boring. You want to capture your new acquaintance’s interest by using emotion words so they can connect with you on a genuine level. Instead of going into detail about where you stayed on your trip to London, talk about how anxious you felt when you almost missed your connection. Instead of describing how long your commute is, discuss how much you dread that hour of your day.
講話內容太客觀實則枯燥乏味。如果你想讓對方感興趣，那就多聊點你的感受吧！比如出門旅行這種事，與其嘮叨那些細碎的經過，倒不如跟大家分享你差點找不到北的囧事兒，和如何打發漫長旅途的郁悶。
4.Think of who this person reminds you of.
4.對方讓你想起了誰？
If this person reminds you of a friend, someone on TV, or a public figure, tell them, as long as it isn’t insulting, of course. People love to hear who others think they look or act like. It is flattering that someone thinks about you enough to compare you to someone that they know and like.
不管是身邊的親朋好友，還是電視里的名人明星，如果你發現對面這個人和其中哪位有些相似，就大膽說出來吧！大部分人還是會認為這是認可和稱贊噠~
5.Say positive things.
5. 講話要有正能量。
Don’t complain or whine about your life or discuss how upset you are by friend or work drama. This makes a potential friend wary of getting too close. It can seem like you’re always creating drama and negative energy, which is a turn off.
抱怨和發牢騷就免了吧！人家還沒怎么跟你接觸，估計就快受不了了。想想看也能知道，誰會跟平時就愛大驚小怪和滿滿負能量的人做盆友呢？
6.Don’t gossip.
6.別做大嘴巴！
Many people will gossip right back, but then won’t be interested in becoming a closer friend to you. In the back of their mind, they will keep wondering what you’re going to say about them when their back is turned. Try to stay positive and give people the benefit of the doubt when you talk about them, or better, just talk about the two of you without dragging others, who aren’t even there, into the conversation.
愛跟別人說閑話的人，旁人都不敢跟他們走太近。誰知道你一扭臉，又會說人家什么呢？所以，聊天的時候最好讓人家知道你不是大嘴巴，沒事兒別老把其他人扯進話題里。
7.Don’t self-deprecate.
7. 別說自己的壞話。
It can make people feel awkward to be around individuals who talk badly about themselves, complaining about their various terrible qualities. They feel like they have to reassure you, and nobody wants to be someone’s therapist.
在人前數落自己的不是，會讓旁人十分尷尬。這讓人家該怎么回應你呢？畢竟不是所有人都能像心理醫生那樣當你的垃圾桶。
8.Praise mutual friends.
8.稱贊你倆的好友。
If you know someone in common, talk nicely about them. This will increase the chances that this new acquaintance thinks well of you, and it also makes it likely that the three of you can hang out sometime.
如果你們都和同一個人是好朋友，那就一起說說他的好話吧！這樣做不僅能提升你們對彼此的好感，還為今后大家一起玩耍創造了機會。
9.Discuss potential future activities.
9.聊聊今后可以一起參加的活動。
If your new acquaintance mentions an activity that you also enjoy, invite them to join you in the future. Not in a creepy way where you bring out your phone and start looking at the calendar, but just say that you’d love to have them come along surfing the next time you go to the beach, or whatever the case may be.
如果新認識的小伙伴提到了一個你很感興趣的活動，下次有類似的活動別忘了叫上他們。千萬不要太一本正經地拿出手機查你的檔期，你只需立刻表現出熱情就好了。
10.Don’t be shy about asking to connect.
10.要個聯系方式不必害臊。
Plant the seed that you want to be closer friends by saying something like, “I’ll definitely have to friend you on Facebook.” This is also a good way to assess whether this person is also interested in being friends. If they seem excited and later immediately accept your friend request, it’s likely that a friendship may be developing.
想要和人家成為好朋友，就別太矜持了。社交媒體這么多，加個微博微信神馬的沒什么大不了。如果對方能爽快地接受邀請加你做好友，那說明他對你的印象也還不錯。
